Today is 3rd Ramadhan. And it my 1st time called my dad after the last time Im went back to my hometown in April. They said, a child must call his/her parents at least once a day. And spend a little time to have a real conversation together. I would love to. Really love to.
My dad married to Mak Jah when I was about 7. And don't really understand what happen during that time. All I know I have beautiful lovely biological mother and a strict, hardworking father. Everything seems normal. 

And I remember my childish moment, playing with friends and the only conversation that I had with my dad is 'Abah, ada 20sen tak.?'. And he will give me with smile. And I spend with sweets and ice cream. *Why talking about food in the middle of the day on Ramadhan.? :P
Until one point I felt that I spend most of my time with mom and school. And less with my King. As said, King is hardly to reach, sometimes I watched my dad behind sliding door (as he managed his workshop in front of our house). Then I realized he barely sleep at our house. And it keep on until never at all. From stay, he visited us. That time I know I have to share my King to another kingdom. Or precise from what I felt, I lost my King in my kingdom.
Well, I tried to rebel. But it is stupid as it sound. Then, 'the power of Love' phrase came out of nowhere. 'Instead of be a bad kid, why not be something that you will never regret'. I start to that nerd. Study and study and study. No time for nothing. Hoping that I will regain my King back. But I dont know the rule. Once King down in a kingdom, he will never return. 
When I was 19, Im leaving home for Matriculation. Frankly, I lost myself 2yrs back then. No friends, new school, warning letter and more to sport. At least hockey beat me till Im down. At least, I see the sweat, blood and the deep of my wounds. I forgot that I have an issue.
 Im not into study when in Matric. Hectic life it is. 24/7 focus with chemical bonding, calculation and simply I dont know what Im study there. I felt a bit alive when dad visit me once every 2 weeks. With his family of course. The fact of visiting me, felt like I spend my time to listen little strangers talking to each other. Hey, they cool. So do I. And I remember, I forgot to approach my dad since. Like the real one. Like a daughter to father. Or Im just never did. And I never know how. And I believe he forgot to approach me like a father. Or he never did. Or he never know how.

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